It has always caught my attention… There is a sign at the entrances of Sufi educational institutions, or in some visible place, written “Edep Ya Hu!”, which means “O Allah (swt), give us decently! ” On some signs, this phrase is written in Arabic script in Islamic calligraphy. What does “edep” (decency) mean? Why do Sufis attach special importance to decency? Why is so much emphasis placed on decency?

Yes, “edep” (decency or manners) means a lot to a person… “Decency” is a term that defines all the divine virtues that make man a mature human being. Decency purifies the human soul of bad behaviors that are even worse than animal behaviors. Decency is the beauty of behavior and harmony of the “heart and demeanor” of the perfect human being. It is the exaltation of morality. It is the state of the human being who has reached the fifth dimension through divine training.

Edep (decency) is a condition of the personality that arises from the passage of the human being through the training of Allah (swt), by acquiring the morality of Him and His distinguished messengers. The difference between people with and without decency is the difference between a mature person and a crude and crude person. Decency transforms a person who is cruel, greedy, greedy, selfish, harsh and rude, impatient and unreliable, always in a hurry and eager to continually pursue the desires of his ego, into a person who is resigned, mature, caring, generous, just, benevolent , Patient, calm, serious, frank and pleasant person, who is not in a hurry and is not anxious in his work. In short, a person with edep is the “true human being”. That person is the caliph of Allah (swt) on earth.

# Decency begins with obedience

Dear readers, decency begins with obedience. Obedience is a state of submission and delivery. Obedience is submitting to the wishes of others, acting according to their wishes and orders, submitting and submitting to them.

I am sure that as soon as you have read these lines a reaction has arisen in you. I am sure that you have begun to experience in your souls the spiritual difficulties that you will face when acting according to the wishes and orders of others. Imagining the things that bother people in the real world will also be annoying when you imagine it. In fact, the hardest thing for a human being with personality to bear is being subject to other human beings. Because having a personality means, in a sense, having an opinion and will, acting according to one’s own desires and being one’s own master. On the other hand, when you depend on others, you can feel humiliated, low and hurt in your personality. Therefore, many crude people get into a bad mood when they cannot do what they want and have to act according to the wishes of others. I said it in one of my previous articles that a good person and a bad person can be distinguished when that person’s wishes are not fulfilled. A lot of people are quite okay as long as you follow through on their wishes, but once you disobey, they immediately get offended, get mad at you, start giving you the evil eye. They may even develop a grudge against you; they hate you and use abusive language. The reason for all this is the injury to the personality and the prohibition or limitation of owning oneself.

Dear readers; This damage to the personality, prohibiting and limiting one’s own independence, constitutes the essence of the training of the nafs (ego). The nafs-training is an education of the personality. More clearly, removing the human personality that entices a person to do whatever he wants and to be his own master, that makes him commit all those improper actions, and replacing it with a divine personality that is subject to the will of Allah. (swt). . Only after that can a person become a mature person.

# A neat person himself is a raw human being

A self-ordered person whose demands were not limited in any way in the period of childhood and whose complete desires were always satisfied is a raw human being. They try to do everything they want. They always want their wishes and demands to be satisfied. They never think of others. They begin to mature only when their wishes are restricted or when they are forced to obey the wishes and wills of others. In our country (Turkey), a person is not considered to be mature even after graduating from university if he has not completed his military service and has not yet married. In fact, the maturing effects of these two institutions, military and marriage, on people cannot be denied. The most important reason is that people naturally learn to be subject to the wishes of others in these institutions.

Therefore, the basis of good child training is to teach the child decency, that is, to refrain from acting according to one’s own desires but to take into account the needs of others, teach the child to share with others and act according to the wishes of others. others from time to time.

# disappearing

Dear readers,

An intellectual person has different thoughts, desires and wills than others. A person has a unique “personality” in achieving these differences. However, this situation leads a person to be independent of others; subject to his servile desires and the desires cause him to have trouble. Such an egotistical personality will be a misfortune for both the person and the society in which he lives, if he does not undergo divine formation and acquire divine virtues. Look around you and try to remember the incidents that occur. Many sad events that shake societies are made of such selfish personalities. A human being can only save himself, in the fifth dimension, leaving his selfish personality and reaching salvation by acquiring the new selfless personality proposed by Allah (swt). A human being who voluntarily renounces his opinion and will, and makes his human personality ineffective in his behavior, is called the one in the position “Fena” (disappearance) in Sufism. This is a spiritual swoon.

Fena (to disappear) is to renounce one’s own desires and desires, that is, one’s own personality (ego). After a person gives up his own wishes, he assumes the persona of the person to whom he is subject; it unites his own personality with that person’s personality because the person is not acting in accordance with his own personality and wishes, but in accordance with the wishes of the person to whom he is subject. In tasawwuf education, this is called the “Fena” (non-existence) stage.

# Three levels of the “Fena” stage

“Fena” The position has three levels before reaching a state of full maturity:

In the first level, the person has to obey the wishes of Murshid-I Kamil on whom he depends and surrenders. This is called the “Fena fish-Sheyh” situation, which means disappearing in Murshid-I Kamil. Dervish Yunus has expressed this state, as “We become servants at the gate of Taptuk…” At this stage, a person tries to carry out all the demands of the Sufi thinker.

Secondly, the person has to be subject to the wishes of Rasulullah, which is called “Fena fir-Rasul” (disappear in Rasulullah). At this stage, a person considers the way Rasulullah had lived and his deeds as an example and tries to abide exactly by his wishes and tries not to deviate an inch from Rasulullah’s wishes.

Thirdly, a person has to surrender to the proposals, wishes and orders of Allah (swt), and that stage is called “Fena fillah” which means to disappear in Allah (swt). A person in this position tries to learn all the proposals, wishes, commands and prohibitions of Allah (swt) in every detail and to be subject to Allah (swt) and tries not to deviate an inch from the wishes of Allah (swt). A person at this stage wants everything, says everything and does everything for the sake of Allah (swt).

# Full surrender

Therefore, the behavior of the person who is in a state of total surrender to Allah (swt) becomes completely in accordance with the wishes of Allah (swt). After this level, all the wishes emanating from that humble servant become the wish of Allah (swt), all his gazes become gazes with the divine light of Allah (swt), all his actions become behavior who complies with the morality of Allah (swt) and his messengers. In other words, the virtues of Allah Almighty begin to emerge in that humble servant. Allah (swt) becomes the seeing eye, the hearing ear of that servant. Allah Almighty has expressed this state in a holy hadith as follows:

“Among the things that bring My servant closer to Me, the ones I love the most are the things that I have made fard. When My servant performs the supererogatory ibadat, he becomes so close to Me that I love him very much. When I love him, I become his ear that hears, in his eye that sees, in his hand and foot that walks. I give him whatever he desires. When he calls upon me for help, I rescue him immediately.” (Bukhari, Rikak, 38) [1]

Dear readers, a person endowed with this mercy from Allah (swt) now reaches the pinnacle of decency and maturity. Obviously, such a state can be reached after very hard self-training with the help of Allah (swt) and not everyone can be endowed with it. May Allah (swt) make us one of the perfectly mature people whose life will end in this state. May Allah (swt) give us the security of faith in our last breaths.

To be entrusted to Allah.