What happens when two people in the office strike up a conversation at the water dispenser? Lots of gossip and a touch of flirtation at work, no doubt. Pressure Coolers, the UK water cooler specialists, bring us the top ten office chat lines we all love to hate…

Every office has its collection of flirts, lotharios, nerds, and shy. Usually everyone is sitting alone at their desks or spending their time isolated in their booths on the phone. But, like the animals of the plain, they all flock to the local watering hole. Your office water cooler may be the place where star-crossed lovers first meet or, most likely, the place where someone tried an unforgettable line on you.

Flirts say the best lines, as they are usually just joking around and don’t take themselves too seriously. You’ve probably come across the office flirt many times at the water cooler, saying;

“I know water is good for the body, but boy, how much have you been drinking?”

“You know, they might ask you to leave soon, you’re making the other men/women look really bad.”

“You see my friend there -[vaguely waving at someone in the office] He wants to know if you think I’m cute.”

“Is it hot in here or is it just you?”

If this sounds like you, or someone you know, then be careful. If flirts receive too much criticism for the quality of their conversation, they can easily become the lotharios of the office out of sheer desperation. These super flirts don’t really care if you like their lines or not because they’re going to say them anyway, and they’re bound to be outrageous. Spotting a lothario is easy, as they can say things like:

“What has 160 teeth and holds back the Incredible Hulk? My zipper!”

“You know how some men make up for certain… shortcomings by buying a really expensive car? Well, I don’t even drive.”

However, you might prefer Lothario’s straightforward streak when up against the cringe-worthy advances of the shy guy from the office…

“You are the only reason I have come here alone.”

“Were you smiling at me just now or did I put my contacts back in wrong?”

Both are preferable to the miserable lines trotted by the office nerd whose path you don’t usually cross. A couple of options are:

“Are you busy tonight…at 3 am?”

“Can I connect my FireWire to your USB?”

On these lines, Matthew Mitchison, director of Pressure Coolers, jokes: “Perhaps people will be encouraged to make more use, or better use, of their office water cooler from now on.” One thing is certain, office flirting around the water cooler is a natural phenomenon that should be allowed to continue unashamedly and unabated.