Are you stuck in a friends with benefits situation with a guy? Are you frustrated because all your conversations with him are about the next booty call? Do you want me to stop treating you like a sex toy and start loving you for who you are? Here are 4 tips to break the cycle and turn your lust into love.

Tip #1 – Forgive and let go.

The first step is the most important, because many women get caught up in the “blame game” after a friends with benefits situation breaks down. Don’t try to blame him for your situation and don’t try to “get even” by making his life miserable. It just doesn’t work.

The best thing you can do is simply forgive him and yourself for getting yourself into such a mess in the first place. Crazy things happen when emotions run wild! After forgiveness, find ways to get away from him, at least in the meantime. Go see your friends, get to work, meet other men. In other words, he starts to pick up the pieces.

Tip #2: Use the phone or email.

Some people say that the “best” way to break up with someone is through a face-to-face meeting. But that is not always the case, because sometimes a face-to-face meeting makes a breakup impossible. Your emotions could get carried away again, and before you know it, you’re back in his room…

Yeah, breaking up over the phone or email isn’t classy. But it’s still the best thing to do. After all, what’s so elegant about a friends with benefits situation to begin with?

Stop doing this. If you have to do it by email, go ahead!

Tip #3: Go cold turkey.

Breaking up with a bed partner is pretty much the same as breaking up with a bad boyfriend: you just have to go cold turkey. There is no communication at all! Delete his numbers, remove him from Facebook, give him back his clothes. It is the only way to free yourself completely.

Tip #4 – Give yourself some time to recover.

After you get out of your friends with benefits situation, you’re not supposed to start another relationship right away. You’re supposed to give yourself some room to breathe and heal. You will need time to get used to a new life, one that really invites willing men to commit to your life.

How long? Give yourself at least 2-3 months. He will surely try to change your mind, so it may be a while before he gives in and cringes.

I hope these 4 tips help you break free from a “sex only” relationship! But here’s a new challenge: How do you attract better, more mature, and more committed men into your life?

That’s something I’d love to help you with!